Today, I want to talk about Procrastination – and how to do it the right way.
You heard me right… how to procrastinate the “right way”.
Yes, you are allowed to procrastinate and Yes, there is a good way to do it.
Us women are usually pretty good at nurturing others. Some of us are even amazing at caring for others.
Actually, I think the majority of us enjoy taking care of our loved ones.
We like being needed – and for the most part, we have no problem ignoring our own needs in favor of someone else’s.
I’m NOT saying all women are built this way. But 95% of the women I have served in the last two decades operate from their hearts and truly enjoy taking care of others.
Their human family as well as their fur family.
However, I want you to notice something important in one of the sentences above:
In general, we have no problem ignoring our own needs in favor of someone else’s.
This can be a real issue when you are the primary caregiver of a family member and you can’t ever find the time to take care of yourself.
Not only does this effect your health, but this effects your horse too.
This is a two-fold issue for today’s horsewoman.
1 – You are your horse’s world. So, if you’re not well-rested, well-fed and feeling good, you aren’t at your best. Meaning, you aren’t serving yourself or your horse at your best and you’re definitely not showing up at your best.
You can’t hide it because your horse knows you that well. Your horse can see right through you and knows you’re down, depressed, stressed, and not 100%
- One aspect of this is that when you feel down, depressed, stressed, etc.… One of the best ways to help yourself is to be with your horse.
- They are very healing, loving, and caring. But you don’t want to only see your horse when you’re in this frame of mind. Sometimes is ok, but not ONLY.
- Your horse needs some fun times, some happy memories with you, and be allowed to get to know the happy you.
- Plus, if you only go see your horse when you are upset, your horse may grow to dislike you and your attitude. Therefore, you may be developing just the opposite of what you want in your horse. Distrust, anger, frustration, and avoidance.
2 – I repeat: You are your horse’s world. So, if you are neglecting yourself, you are automatically neglecting your horse. You’re not putting out your best you. You’re not being your best as a trainer or partner.
You’re not being as mindful of your body language, your attitude, your focus, your presence, and a million other little things that slip through the cracks when we’re tired and cranky.
- One aspect of this is that if you are distracted and not 100%, you can risk your safety, your horse’s safety, trip and fall, use the wrong cue, lose your balance and fall off your horse, or open yourself up for other accidents.
- Plus, when your horse views you as “unsafe” you will lose the connection you want, and your horse will not trust you and he/she won’t want to be close to you.
Ergo, if you’re serious about having a true heart-to-heart relationship and partnership with your horse, you have to learn to say no sometimes.
Let me be extraordinarily clear: I am NOT advocating you don’t feed your kids, or you don’t go into work. Let’s be realistic.
But you can certainly say no to some of the things clogging up your day and taking time away from you being at your best.
1. Prioritize what’s important and when it’s important
Then let a few lower priority things slide until the next day so you can give yourself some healing time relaxing, meditating, or being
… with your horse.
And give your horse some real quality time with the real you – 100% YOU
When you say “yes” all the time and try to do too many things you put yourself last. This means you put your health and happiness last. However, when you do this – everyone losses out.
I am all for taking care of someone else, especially if it is your horse. But you have to be healthy enough to take care of someone else.
So, in essence, you need to take care of yourself first before you are really able to take care of someone else, properly.
2. Give yourself some down time
I used to hang a sign on my office door: “Quiet time in Progress. Please do not knock unless it’s an emergency.” And it worked.
Sometimes just 15 minutes here and there makes a world of difference.
And you can say no to parties, TV, mindless scrolling on social media, and even dinner out with a spouse when you know you’re too tired or that you really need some rest.
Your body and your mind need rest in order to heal and rejuvenate.
Getting 8 hours of sleep each night does a lot of good, but if your day is jam packed, sometimes that’s really 8 hours of worried restless sleep. That doesn’t count.
So, take some quiet time to yourself each day. If you can do that with your horse, even better!
I don’t regret missing a TV series or a spontaneous night out with friends. Just last night I stopped watching TV in the middle of a show and told my husband that I really needed to go to bed as I was exhausted.
I needed that restful time, just to prepare myself to go to sleep in order to get a “Good Night’s Sleep”.
But I DO regret the times I could have spent a little more time with my horse or the times I cut our time short to do something that later really didn’t matter.
Choosing to put you and your horse first sometimes is very healthy for your own mental state. And when you are in a good mental state, you are better at taking care of others.
Sharper, Healthier, and Happier!
That special relationship is not only about unconditional love and understanding between you and your horse, but it is the best therapy and healing for the heart and soul I’ve ever seen.
Go ahead and Procrastinate…
Say “no” to the things in your life that don’t matter. Procrastinate THOSE things. Invest fully in a happy and healthy you and a happy healthy horse.
Because you will regret not having the results you want with your horse if you don’t. You will regret not having that time and those special moments with your horse. Time flies by quickly. Don’t put it off.
I see it too often…the “should of’s, could of’s, and would of’s”
How to know if you need to Procrastinate:
- What did you do this week that won’t matter in several years (or even next week)?
- How often do you say no to things that don’t matter?
- How often do you put off working with your horse because someone else “needs” you?
- How much time did you spend on yourself this week? (this month)?
- How much quality time did you spend with your horse this week?
- Did you miss spending time with your horse this week?
How to Procrastinate the “right way”:
- Make a list of all the activities you participate in that aren’t going anywhere. (Movies, parties, errands, things someone else can handle for you.)
- Next write a list of things that you know must take priority NOW – and look at it often.
- Every day, question what you’re doing. Which list is it on? You don’t want to be looking back, regretting what you could have done.
- Priorities can change on a daily, weekly, or monthly basis. Be flexible and give yourself a pat on the back for giving yourself some quality time with your horse.
- Schedule 15 minutes every two hours, or every day, for quiet time for yourself to do something good for you.
- Schedule at least 30 minutes every day or every other day with your horse if you are close by. Or at least one good day or two hours a week if you have to drive far to see your horse.
- Make your time count for you and your horse.
Make sure you invest in yourself. Stretch, grow, learn and become a better version of you for both you and your horse. This will also help you help others.
If this is difficult for you, you don’t have to do it alone. (Sometimes it can feel like torture and it may take five times longer trying this alone)
I can help you. I’ll walk you through building a successful mindset and program for both you and your horse, step by step. Let me know your horse dreams and I will help you get there.
It’s about having a plan and a system to guide you. It’s about breaking down old patterns, holding yourself accountable and consistently choosing to be happy and reach for your dreams without giving up.
Let’s make it happen, together.
Give me a call and we can chat about possibilities and options. It’s a complimentary call with me to chat about horse stuff. Fun!