Why? What makes you cry?

I was taking part in the Tony Robbins Comeback Challenge and it really made me think. Tony Robbins is an amazing inspirational speaker and he can really pull some good stuff from inside of you. He asked, “Why do you do what you do? and What makes you cry?”

What he was trying to pull out of everyone was “what touches your heart so much that you can’t help but cry every time you think about it”. But cry in a good way, not a bad way. You know those memories or thoughts that are so heart-warming and touching that the tears just start to flow.

This was my answer and I thought I would share it with you.

I have always been a person who has rescued animals throughout my lifetime. And I am still doing it today. Any animal that needs help, I’m there for them – birds, rabbits, racoons, skunks, squirrels, cats, kittens, dogs, horses, and more.

Here’s a video of a crow I rescued – Joe. The first video is the day he came to me for help. The second is after he was well and set free. He still enjoyed our time together.

 
Even though I love all animals, my passion is horses and I have been with them since I was 6 years old. By the way, my first horse was a rescue and every horse since then. And, while working with my rescue horses and the rescues of my friends, I started to notice a pattern.

The rescue horses that had been thrown away, abused, abandoned, and discarded usually had one of two personalities. They were either disconnected, cold, cut off, dead in the eyes, and shut down, which is called Learned Helplessness. These horses had just given up hope that anyone would ever listen or care for them.

Or they were so angry, resentful, distrusting, and aggressive because they have had enough and were fighting back with everything they had. These horses had gone from asking, to demanding, to now yelling as loudly as they could just to be heard.

Even though my approach worked with horses that weren’t in one of these two categories and I helped horses with many different issues, I was still drawn to this select group of horses. The ones who needed that extra special touch and consideration.

The more I saw this, the more I realized that there wasn’t anyone helping these horses. They were just being given away, turned out alone in a pasture and never visited, or worse…put down. I just couldn’t believe it. It broke my heart that someone could do this to a horse. They are such amazing, special creatures to me, I just had to do something.

I saw this way too often when traveling around the world to do clinics as well. I would show up and in almost every single clinic, there was at least one person with the same story to tell. They would tell me that they had seen their horse, fallen madly in love and just had to have them. Then when they got their horse home, they realized that he or she was too ‘this’ or too ‘that’ and it was a lot more than they could handle.

Then after trying this method and that style, they still had trouble with their horse. The one thing they never had trouble with though was loving their horse with all their heart and wishing that they could help them with whatever issues they were having. They wanted their horse to be happy, to be trusting, to be safe, and to be the horse that they knew deep down in their heart that they had connected with when they first saw them.

And every single person, that was in this situation, ALL said:

• I fell in love with my horse right away
• I knew my horse needed me to help him/her
• I know that there is a loving, caring, gentle horse in there
• I don’t want to listen to what everyone else is telling me about my horse
• It will break my heart if I have to give my horse up
• I’m willing to do whatever I need to do to make it work
• There HAS to be a way!

It just broke my heart every time I saw this because I could see what they saw. First, I could see their genuine love for their horse and desire to help resolve the issues, and I also saw the desperate need and yearning from the horse to be in a forever, loving home.

So, my passion become narrower and I wanted to focus on helping horse owners understand and help their own horses out of these two categories – Learned Helplessness and Angry and Resentful. I wanted to help the two of them work on a way to stay together and give the horse a forever, loving home as well as the owner the horse that they “knew” was truly there.

Well, as the world evolves so do most of us in it. And lately my world has become even smaller and my focus even more specific for helping the horses that need a voice even more.

When I moved to Maryland I stopped traveling to do clinics, but I have a farm where people come to me to work with my horses or bring their own horses. I also have students taking my introductory online courses as well as working with me in my total immersion concierge program. And I noticed another pattern emerging.

The students working with me personally were telling me stories of their horses either being shut down or being way too unpredictable and high strung. Neither of which was safe to be around. They also said that they had tried lots of other avenues that didn’t work the way they wanted. Plus, they had been told to get another horse because ‘this one’ wasn’t right for them. As if the horse was a piece of furniture.

They were all heartbroken with the thought of having to give their horse up because they loved them so much and only wanted the best for their horses. They just couldn’t find a way to help that worked for their horse or them.

So, not only were they trying to keep their horse and give them a forever loving home, but they also were on their last hope. They were driven to find a way to reach their horse and work together to resolve whatever issues had brought them to this spot.

Now my focus is on only these two types of horses and the amazing people who own them that are trying to help them. It went deeper than just developing a relationship and a loving forever home. It was now about developing the true nature and a genuine, trusting horse that they knew was there, deep down…their dream horse.

And for me, it was also about developing those horse’s dream person. Someone who could understand them, could be compassionate about their issues, help resolve their fear memories and traumas, and someone who could communicate with them and see the world through their eyes.

So, please, please, if you are someone in this same situation, please give me a call. Let’s talk. Take another chance on your horse and sign up for one of my introductory courses to see if my approach resonates with you. Please, do NOT give up on your horse or yourself. It can and will get better for the both of you. Your issues are repairable.

If you have the desire to help your horse, if you have the desire to learn more and become competent and confident with your horse, then please keep going. Whether it is with me or someone else that touches your heart and is able to see the true beauty and kindness in your horse’s heart… please keep trying.

Every student that I have worked with personally has accomplished their dream goals and they now have that amazing horse that they always knew was there. And the best part for me, is that their horse has the best possible person for them who not only cares, but also knows how to communicate and how to cooperate better as a herd member and best friend.

The transformations in both horse and human have been a blessing and a gift. To see it happen right in front of my eyes and to see the pure joy in both the human and their horse is priceless! I am so honored and thankful to be able to help these people follow their hearts, reach for their dreams, and actually accomplish them. It touches my heart and makes me cry every time I see it come together.

So, if you need someone to help you get there or just someone to confide in and talk to for advice, I’m here for you. I mean it! I truly want to help and do the right thing for those people and horses that really need it.